What a wonderful day I had! My 19 year old called me up and offered to take me to lunch. When he arrived to pick me up I suggested we stop by the early voting office to cast our vote. Once we both casts our ballots for Obama I was so excited I stopped in front of the VOTE HERE sign and one of the passers by took our picture – my son was embarrassed…lol. I told him he’d appreciate that photo in about 15 years when he looked back and realized that he cast his first vote for a man that was making history, looked like him and more importantly is the best choice for this country during this election.
We arrived at the restaurant, ordered our food and had a heartfelt conversation. You see my 19 year old was an extremely rebellious and angry teen. I mean he had me at my wits end and I didn’t always respond correctly. Today I felt the need to tell him how much I love him and realize that I’ve not always made the best choices or reacted in the correct way when he was acting out and that I was sorry for that – no parent is perfect, but this parent loves you more than you know. He smiled and said, “You know mom, I was responsible for the drama and I owe you the apology. I’ve always loved you too – even when I was acting crazy”.
Hearing him take responsibility for his actions let me know that he is in fact growing up to be a man and that many of the lessons I’ve tried to instill in him have stuck.
I’m saying this to to say that while we may not always be perfect parents….we must always be loving & honest parents and be able to admit when we’ve goofed to our children. If they don’t see us admit to mistakes, how will they be confident enough to admit to theirs? I think my son respects me more for admitting that I was not perfect but that I’ve always done my best. A friend of mine told me to look at it this way. Look back over your parenting and if you did the right thing 85% percent of the time….you’ve done great!
Regina said,
February 21, 2008 at 3:51 pm
I think it is awesome when you get a small inclination that something you did with your kids was actually right and they actually appreciate and thank you for it!!
aj said,
February 21, 2008 at 4:02 pm
Yes, it is refreshing and I’m more at ease with them living away from home (5 minutes away). Him moving into an apartment really helped him to grow up and be responsible – but that’s another post…lol
chocl8t said,
February 24, 2008 at 6:22 pm
AJ, my mom would always say to me and my sister that just because she was the parent didn’t mean that she would always be right. Her willingness to admit this made it easier to talk to her when I messed up. It remains the same today and I will follow her example when I have children.
BTW…those little rewards and treasures will continue to come from your son letting you know you did the right thing.