November 28, 2007 at 4:49 pm (Basics, Small Things, Step Mother, Step mom)
Tags: Appreciation, Step Child, Step-Mothers, Working Together
I’ve been on all sides of the blended family scene, the step-parent, the step-child, the biological parent, etc. you name it, I’ve been it. I’ve been blessed by it in a way as I can help others to see the different sides of the table and appreciate for myself the difficulties each side represents.
When my son went to live temporarily with his bio-dad and step-mom, I was quite apprehensive and concerned that this woman would mistreat my son. I made it my busineess to be cordial to her and express appreciation for the little things she did for my son – even while he showed her his behind. I also called her on the things I thought were out-of-order. I’m saying this to say, give credit where it is due and when you need to put the step-parent in check, you will not be viewed as the angry bio-parent. Remember, it is in your child’s best interest to work WITH the other set of parents, not against them.
I even sent her a heartfelt Mother’s Day card, because after all, she was taking care of my baby in all of his angry teenage rebellion – I knew it was not an easy situation for her to deal with – I knew my son……
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November 5, 2007 at 9:01 pm (Basics, Step Mother, Step Parent, Step mom)
Tags: , Appropriate, Biological Mother, Jealousy, Step Child, Step Mother, Step Relatinships
Well he/she may call you alot of things…I was referring to what they call you in your face..lol. My step daughter began calling me Mom immediately after we got married of her own free will. I think she was longing for a female role model and I was it because her bio-Mom had pretty much abandoned her when she was very young (4) – when bio-Mom left her husband she took her pet bird and left her child – can you say “selfish”. Anyway I was fine with it but once, the bio Mom heard her refer to me as Mom, she dayum near jerked the childs arm off and yell’d at her “She is not your mother”? Well I beg to differ. You see I was the one combing her hair, purchasing her clothes with MY OWN money, helping to ensure she did her homework, explaining menstral cycles, boys, etc. Where was her bio-mother – oh she was off living the high life, traveling the world, making CD’s, etc. while I raised her daughter who has BTW grown into a beautiful young woman.
These folk kill me saying who is a mother and who is not. Just because you give birth to a child does not make you a mother in the true sense of the word. Even the children know that.
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